This morning I woke up from some pretty upsetting dreams. In my dream state there were several different experiences, and at their core was a theme of blaming myself for the uncomfortable situations that were taking place. If I had done this differently, if I had said this instead of that, if I had been kinder, if I had worked harder…
I woke up rattled.
I sat up in bed dazed…confused and trying to focus my thoughts on the day ahead of me.
I read my lesson from A Course in Miracles – today it told me, “I am upset because I see a meaningless world.”
That resonated with how my first 5 minutes of consciousness were going.
I then entered a conversation with my husband that had good intentions but went south fast. Before long it was a circular argument, each of us taking turns pointing the finger at what was wrong with the other.
I did what I could to distract myself and within a few minutes of ending the conversation I began to find some silence and peace in my heart.
The things I was saying to him were true. The things he was saying to me were true. At one point I realized, no one is going to “win” this. There is never a winner. I also began to see his side. I saw that the things that he was or wasn’t doing that bothered me so much were the same things he was pointing out to me. That’s why there’s no winner. We were literally equal in our accusations.
Several hours later I went to do a reading for a friend and I decided to pull a Tarot card for myself. Sometimes it just feels like the shift I need to realign my direction. I shuffled up my deck and one card in particular was sticking out… so I flipped it and revealed The Magician.
The Magician is an incredible card because of the lesson he reminds me of. There is nothing you can’t do with what you’ve been given.
This morning sucked.
Honestly… what is worse than waking up to bad dreams and starting the day with an argument. But that’s what The Magician works with. He doesn’t make magic out of ONLY the good… he takes it all, the good, the “bad”, the uncomfortable and the peaceful and he turns it into something…well, Magical! He is an alchemist. He is able to see anything and everything as a tool, a resource that will help you. He is a miracle worker… and what is a miracle? A miracle is a shift in thinking, a shift in perception. A miracle is when we can look at the bad dream and realize it isn’t there to haunt us, it’s there to help us correct, to adjust, to see where we are in fear and shift to love.
My husband wouldn’t hear me when I told him that my dream was telling me something. He told me several times, “it’s just a dream, it’s not real!” Which… on many levels was the point of the dream. In the dream, I saw myself as guilty, as the one being blamed for all of these problems around me. And although his delivery of the message wasn’t soft and cuddly, it was true. It’s not real. The blame I felt in the dream isn’t real. I’m the one who was holding on to guilt that isn’t there. It was a choice and it’s a choice I don’t have to embrace.
We all have decisions to make. We make them all day, every day. We have the choice to see the blame, to feel guilt, to assign guilt to others, or we have the choice to know that we are the decision maker, creating our life. Just like the magic, the miracles – that are created by The Magician. The Magician in my card deck wears a pair of infinity glasses. He knows his power. He knows that his power is never ending, that all situations that come to him are opportunities, and if he looks at them through the infinite power that he is, he will see miracles in all of it.
Albert Einstein was quoted as saying, “There are only two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle.”
Today I invite you to sit for a moment and really look at what is going on in your life, look at how you view your situations, how you view your experience. Look around and ask yourself, where can I create a different life? Where can I become more like The Magician, the miracle worker? Where can I change my perspective? What kind of tools is the Universe sending me that I can wield differently?
In every moment we have the chance to embrace the infinite magic of miracle thinking or fall victim to our circumstances.
It’s up to us to change our minds.